I read Bruce a blog post written by a mom who works outside the home. In that post she shared the challenges of Sunday night preparations for the week ahead.  His unexpected response was:

So, does any mom think she is doing a good job?

{blank stare}

“Um, well. Hmmm. I can’t really think of anyone I know who is 100% confident she’s a great mom.”

He continued, “Why do you think that is?”

{longer pause}

“Maybe it’s the enormity of the job. It’s not like laying bricks or making coffee. These are future adults in the making. If we don’t do the right thing these adults could end up pretty messed up. There is no assurance we are moving in the right direction. Having never done the job before, it’s hard to know what’s ‘right’ and so we look around at how our friends do the same job. Then we read ‘manuals’ on how others think we should do this job (sometimes contradictory approaches). We fall on our face and cry and question and mess up a lot.”

“Can I just say I think you are doing a fabulous job. The fact that y’all care so much and want to read books and learn about how to be a great mom. Doesn’t that inherently mean you are doing a better job than most moms?”

{he’s a good man and he makes a good point}

We do care.

We feel the guilt and shame of losing our patience. The regrets hit when our head hits the pillow. We recount the mistakes of the day, the ways we could have listened better, played more, and yelled less. We care about their hearts.

Yet do I ever count all the wins of the day? The number of times I did listen or negotiate or encourage or feed hungry souls. 

We see the best version of ‘that’ mom and fall way short. Focusing on the one area of motherhood she has mastered yet ignoring the 3 or 4 other areas she struggles. We try to be all the kinds of mom at once: crafty mom, organized mom, fun mom, healthy mom, spiritual mom, and patient mom. We care about their experiences.

Yet do I remember God made me to be his mom?

We pick up the middle child from school and hear he visited the director’s office twice in one 5-hour day. We question all of our discipline methods. Maybe we need more consequences or maybe if we connected to his heart more or… We care about their behavior.

Do I remember only God can change his heart?

We hear them complain because the free toy that came in their happy meal wasn’t the one they wanted. They whine for one more piece of candy. They beg to watch another movie. We feel the weight of raising entitled children. We care about their character.

How often do I take my children for granted? The opportunity to mother a healthy child. Am I an entitled mother?

We read how we should pray more and say less. Doesn’t that family have a morning devotion time? We’ve pinned a link to memory verses for every letter of the alphabet. Maybe the problem with our family is we aren’t “religious enough”. We care about their souls.

Do I remember God is with me (and my children). He never changes. He loves us and simply wants our love in return.

What if we all need to just take one giant breath?

Realize we are doing a great job simply because we care and want to do a better job.

Yes, there are areas we could do better but God is big enough to fill in the gaps.

David beat Goliath not because he was the best warrior but because he had God on His side. 

What a privilege to be challenged so beyond our ability we must rely on our great God. Because if we could be a great mom on our own, then we wouldn’t need God. We would miss out on working with Him to grow these children into adults- to cheerlead them into the Kingdom.

God has called you to see the invisible & do the impossible.

God has not called you to do the things you can do.

He’s called you to do the things that you’ll never be able to do in a billion years.

This great God that we serve will throw us into situations beyond us

with no other thought than His great heart will sustain us. -Graham Cooke

Today when you start to feel like you are not doing a good job as a mom, go to Him. God will sustain you. When you think you just can’t do it. Remember He is right there standing with you.

you (good mom) + God (perfect parent) = BEST MOM EVER!!

You could do a better job. But thank goodness you don’t.

Do you believe you are a good mom? Do you know you are doing a good job?

Next time my husband asks, “So does any mom think she is doing a good job?”

I can tell him about the army of God-centered moms who chant,

“We are doing a great job because God is on our side!!!”