Pre-kids: destined to be a “perfect” mom

 If there had been an interview process for having biological children I would have aced it. I was one of those who loved babysitting, read the entire “Babysitter Club” series, and oogled at any child within 3 feet.  I loved kids so much that I chose a career as a pediatric speech-language pathologist, receiving a Masters degree specializing in 0 to 3 development.

Given all this maternal instinct, experience and expertise, you would think (I sure did) that being a mom would be easy for me. However, only 5 1/2 years into this mothering adventure and I have been humbled multiple, multiple times. The first being the day I brought my oldest son home. I found myself crying in the closet of our bedroom with my husband’s entire family downstairs, holding this newborn, completely overwhelmed and having NO IDEA what to do.

let the humbling begin

My most memorable humbling experience as a mother was right after I had my second son. I was at our local arboretum attempting to appease a grumpy toddler and feed a newborn a bottle…at the same time. While doing my “two-child-song-and-dance” a mentor mom from our church’s MOPS program approached me and offered to help. I first told her the classic mom line, “I’m fine.” She was persistent and asked if she could give the toddler a snack. At this point, my toddler turned his head away from her and said a rude, “NO!”. I was horrified! I scolded the toddler and turned to this kind, wise woman and apologized for his behavior. This is what I will never forget…she looked me straight in the eyes and said, “Why as mothers do we feel we need to apologize for our children? If he wants to be a jerk, let him be a jerk.” Wow! exactly right.

the straw that broke the mama’s pride

The most recent and profound humbling experience was the birth of our third son…born while my oldest was still 3! I could no longer control and apologize for my children’s behavior. I had to depend on God and serve Him. It was no longer possible to serve myself. These three little guys needed me constantly and if they didn’t their dad did. After crying embarrasingly at a fancy Christmas party when simply asked, “So how is it having 3 boys?,” I found that unless God was at the center I was not going to survive this mothering adventure without a lot of humbling.

The reason mothering is so humbling is because the opposite of humility is pride. Pride by definition is a focus on self, desire to control and to use all things for self. When you get married you begin to realize how selfish you are. When you have a child you recognize that you are completely self-centered you are. When you have multiple children you are either humbled on a moment to moment basis OR you have to completely surrender your life and place God in the center.

The goal of this blog is to help other moms remove themselves from the center and place God there so we can serve families with true humility and therefore bring GOD all the glory!