When the fourth person (in a week) asked me,“How’s the book writing going?”, I decided it was time for an update.

Since the whole “writing a book” thing was really God’s idea, updating you is a treat, giving His story more glory (in fact, I’ve set up a series—here—laying out this publication journey…my Ebenezer stones, of sorts).

In my last book update I shared how during the month of November I woke up early (despite middle-of-the night feedings) and scribbled out 3 chapters. And how my agent liked those chapters because I focused on God.

Wouldn’t you know after I wrote that update post a new fear set in.

I started to worry about what I was signing up for if I wrote this book.

Was I giving up my stay-at-home mom status for a new career?

Hadn’t I already given up a speech-language pathology career to stay home full time?

This line of questioning moved into full-on “Moses mode”. Was God really calling me to write this book? Or was it a distraction from my true calling of raising four boys to be godly men?

So I sought God’s thoughts on the matter and asked godly women to pray about which way I should go. Should I set the book down or keep following God’s leading?

These are the words He gave me:

Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD. Psalm 27:14

And this…

See the LORD your God has given you the land. Go up & take possession of it as the LORD the God of your fathers told you. Do not be afraid. Do not be discouraged. Deuteronomy 1:21

And…

The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid. Do not be discouraged. Deuteronomy 31:8

At first glance it may seem contradictory…”wait” and “go”.

But there is an important theme in these verses…The LORD.

I wait for Him. He gives me the “promised land”. He goes before me.

In acknowledging my weakness and depending on His strength, He stoops down and lifts me up. He sustains me. He goes before me. He fights for me. I need to trust in His provision and not fear.

kinda like this moment I captured between my (very strong) nephew and Quade…

His work has been done. The gift has been given. My role has always been to accept His gift of salvation and respond with my gift of faith and obedience. Believing He is God removes the burden of being god myself.

The pieces to write this book are all in place.

I have 2 notebooks full of notes about the book. I have 3 chapters I don’t love and want to re-write. I have a new vision for the book and how it can be a gift of grace and strength to moms instead of bricks and condemnation.

Now I just need to make time.

The second most frequent question I get from friends is,

“How do you have time to write a book?”

The honest answer is…I haven’t been writing a book.

I scribble down thoughts. I talk to my agent. I get encouragement from other authors.

But I don’t have a book contract with a publisher (I’ll definitely let you know if/when that happens).

My summer has focused on the spending time with the boys. And any leftover time is spent working on planning a Christian Women’s blogging conference…the Declare Conference.

After August 9-10^th, a huge chunk of time opens up for me. This Fall all four boys are in school two days a week. I’ve decided if God has provided in so many ways up to this point, He will be faithful to multiply my small gifts of time.

I found these quotes by Crystal Sparks from the Mamas Write conference I attended 2 years ago (the same conference, new name, that I’m now hosting…it’s a God thing.):

• When God calls us to something the enemy will discourage us with disqualifications.
• Others are not anointed to do what you are.
• God’s anointing trumps your talent.
• It matters that you are obedient when He calls.
• You may be shaking on the inside but keep stepping.
• Our job is to move. His job is to bring the results.
• We often overmanage the details.
• Applause of heaven lasts for eternity.  Applause of man lasts for a moment.
• There is a grace in your life to do what you’ve been called to do.
• Your most stressed out times are when you are trying to walk in someone else’s shoes…outside of your allotted grace.

Would you join me in continuing to pray for this book? 

My next milestone is to finish the book proposal. Pray for focus. Pray for His Spirit to guide me during this process. Pray against any barriers to writing.

I’m hopeful some day in the far, far future when this book is a physical object we can all celebrate His work. You are a vital part of this journey. Very thankful for you!

 What do you feel God calling you to do? Have you struggled deciding whether it is a “calling”  or a distraction from your true calling?

*for those interested in my response to the last post…I’m working on it. I’ve invited a really awesome couple to share their thoughts on engaging and even creating culture. Stay tuned.