**First of all, thank you for all the amazing comments & entries to “The Color Method” giveaway. Praying if you didn’t win you will still find a way to study God’s Word. Sounded like several of you were desperate for a way to know God more. Congratulations to the winner, Rebeka Griffith!!**
Having more than two children, all younger than 5 years old, is a challenge.
It’s hard to forget my summer of 2009. . . three boys all under the age of four.
Last week I watched a sweet mom holding a lap-jumping infant, while trying to negotiate with a disgruntled 2 year old, and answer the questions of her curious 4 year old, all in a whisper, trying to keep them quiet in the middle of a theater performance.
That’s when the post traumatic stress feelings came back to me. . .
The overwhelming sense of failing someone or something. Remembering the exhaustion of meeting needs 24/7/365.**
And yet. That’s no longer my reality.
Here I am 5 years later and my life looks completely different.
We just went on a family trip. And yes, of course, there was the usual whining and fatigue. But all-in-all we had a wonderful time with four kids. . .and came back happy, not spent.
So when today’s guest, Hanni Go, mom to 3 kiddos, emailed me about doing an episode focusing on life with lots of young kids, I agreed wholeheartedly. Because moms to little ones need a nap HOPE!
Perhaps you aren’t that mom.
But I’ll bet you know someone who fits this description and could use a little pep talk of “me too” today. Feel free to pass this puppy along to your friend (awarding you 20,000 good friend points).
In our conversation, we cover the gamut. . .from setting your schedule to decreasing middle-child-bad-behavior to spending time with your spouse.
Hanni shares some great practical tips and I try to help give encouragement and perspective.
**And FYI, I also have the fondest memories of cuddling with those three little boys. Spending loads of time playing and loving precious tiny men.
What we chat about:
- How do we balance life when there are so many people who need you, all the time, at the same time
- Re-evaluating commitments during the busy years of little ones
- Accepting the help of others and swallowing our pride, not trying to do it by ourselves
- Setting realistic expectations for how life will be
- Recognizing this time with lots of littles is hard, but over in 5 years.
- The memories of your young children aren’t about your failures, but how they felt
- The challenge of type A moms in the little years to feel like they aren’t getting a lot “done”
- How God shapes us into His image through those challenging times.
- Seeing the significance of the work you are doing–not resenting your husband & his work
- Know what kind of mom you are. . .let go of being all-the-moms
- How to discipline consistently when all your kids are different
- When you and your husband differ on discipline
- Why middle children act out more and how to help
- One guaranteed way to help make your day run more smoothly
- How to get some “self care” time during the day
- Defining what your family values and focus in on those things
- What helped Heather feel ahead of the game during those “little years”
- What Hanni started doing one night a week to feel refreshed and encouraged
- How to care for your marriage during these years with lots of littles
- The value of the little years on your children’s future devotion to God (examples of Hannah & Jochebed)
Links Mentioned:
**Amazon Affiliate Links included below**
- Victoria Wilson–New Mom Episode
- Cru–Campus Crusade for Christ
- Loving the Little Years: Motherhood in the Trenches
by Rachel Jankovic - Own Your Life: Living with Deep Intention, Bold Faith, and Generous Love by Sally Clarkson (Her GCM Podcast Interview)
- Kirk Martin—“How to stop yelling, lecturing, & power struggles”
- Best Behavior Modification Tool–> Mommy time— adapted from Amy McCready at Positive Parenting Solutions
- Kris Habashy-Personal time on Friday nights
- MOPs–to meet other young moms
- Family Life–10 questions you should ask your wife and 10 questions every woman should ask her husband each year
- Gary Thomas Tweet–30 second kiss. . .
What would you add to our conversation?
How to listen to the podcast:
1.Listen on the blog. Click through to GodCenteredMom.com and click the play button at the beginning of this post.
2. Listen on your smartphone, iPad or iPod Touch – There are a lot of great podcasting apps. Apple has a free one (that I mentioned) in the app store, there is also one called Downcast. It allows you to search for shows, subscribe to them and even speed up the audio. If you don’t have an iDevice, you can listen via Stitcher.
3. Subscribe to the Podcast – access the podcast in iTunes (Click here to access via iTunes). You can also search for it on your smartphone app (like the ones listed above) and subscribe.
*If you missed past episodes, you can listen via iTunes or click on this page of the GodCenteredMom site to find a listing of all the episodes.
**Check out this page for instructions on how to leave a rating or review on iTunes: GodCenteredMom.com/review
Great podcast. I really enjoyed listening to it. You hit on a bunch of important key points. That ‘immediate obedience’ thing. Oh my! Talk more about that. 😉
I had 3 under 4 about 15 years ago! My strongest memory of that time is being home. We did so many things, bible studies, music classes, library trips, play dates, and I just went on hiatus with it all after my third son was born. It was right for me at that time, and I’m glad I had the courage to say no to those things because they had become a burden rather than a joy. My memory of that time is one of fulfillment and joy. Time glosses over the exhaustion!
Great show! As a mom of a lot of littles {our oldest had just turned 2 when our triplets were born, our 5th is due in June, we’ll have 5 kids 5 and under} it is so important to reassess your priorities and give yourself lots of grace, it’s not easy to do those things, but it makes life a lot easier. You can’t do it all and trying to will only hurt everyone.
Okay, I truly did want to comment on this episode when it aired, but I was in the throes of the 1st trimester (again!) lol So 1) Thanks for asking for advice Hanni because I’m on my way to becoming a mom of TWO littles! And 2) Thanks Heather for sharing your tips and tricks so openly! 🙂
congrats Victoria on number 2!!! so exciting. And glad you found the advice helpful!!